Back in the Saddle Again

Oh Blogging. Did you know I think about blogging in the middle of an actual event? Like I start thinking of how to describe the event via my blog and I get all excited. Then my phone gets full of pictures, the time passes and eventually I clear the pics off my phone and put them on our family server and suddenly it feels so hard to go back and recap multiple events via blogger. So….I don’t. Then I get all kinds of bummed that I haven’t updated. I don’t honestly believe anyone really reads these right now. I keep it private because of past mishaps with Owen’s ex-wife. I think it unhealthy for anyone to read blogs or Facebook posts from past lovers who have moved on. I used to log on and read David’s (his wife kept a blog). I thought it would just be interesting but it always left me with feelings of strangeness, like I was judging him and his life when I had no right to. He is entitled to his happiness. She is entitled to her freedom of speech, yet I would get all weird and “judgy”. So to keep from that happening against us, I made my blog private. I don’t think I’ll keep it that way anymore though. Our lives are our lives. Judge if you want, but I am proud of who we are.

I do want to free write a little more though. People do it on Facebook all the time and I get jealous. I feel envious they have the uncaring characteristic in their minds and hearts that anyone will argue with them. I don’t like when I express my feeling in this kind of forum and someone feels they must fight me. I feel like it doesn’t make sense. If I say it in a group setting which is obviously asking for conversation back, then yes, I can understand arguing a point with someone. But written as a blog or a post out of your own personal feelings on your own personal page? If you disagree, put it on your own page. Attacking someone else’s makes me feel like they are bullying you. There are books written on topics I don’t agree with. I don’t go write the author a big “well let me tell you what I think!” letter. Why would I subject myself to propaganda I don’t agree with? So then why does the world feel so inclined to rip apart someone’s opinion on a blog? It’s like a short story brain journal. If I ask a question, ok, answering it makes sense. If you think I am uneducated on an issue that it bothers you terribly, then private message me and we can have a discussion if I choose to with you, but otherwise, keep your opinions and your judgments to your own screens.  Crazy? I think not…mainly because I give that respect right back. I may read something you write and I think, “Where the crap did that come from or WOW, if they only knew THIS!” but because it is their page, their blog, their personal space, I don’t pop that barrier or bubble. I respect it. If I am bothered too much by it, I will private message for a discussion unless they don’t want to have one. Then I kindly step out and say, “Ok, it’s not my page, it’s not my right to control their freedom of speech.”

Many years ago, I used to get all sorts of tanked up over an issue someone wrote on Facebook. After years of watching family and friends tear each other apart so bad they actually disowned one another on issues they KNEW they didn’t agree upon in the first place, I decided I don’t care anymore to do it. However, I do find it healthy to have a place to share your experiences and feelings for others to see. While someone may want to fight you, another may bond to what you have said with passion. Someone may be able to relate enough that it helps them through an issue. Or maybe they can bond enough to an issue I am having and help guide me through it. The benefits are wide spread and I’m happy to have that experience in my life.

So, in conclusion, I wanted to explain, my blog is going to be a little more of “this and that”. I want to express my feelings on matters that come upon me. I will share family moments, cheesy pics of my kids, embarrassing pics of my dog, Pinterest wins and fails, topics like weight loss, music, entertainment, working full time, ex-wives, school projects, family pics, crafts, travel, habits, TV and much more. I am not simple enough to narrow my blog to one thing. So if you are ok with that, stick around J if not, I say to you, read if you dare, but please share in private if something I have said offends or bothers you. I will do my best to adjust the offense or explain my perspective respectfully.

Love you all!